Time Out

Most sports have incorporated "time out" into their games, both chosen and forced time outs. Most child care facilities use "time out" for youngsters to regain their sensibility about what is proper behavior. Mediators and counselors use a form of time out to talk about process instead of content.

Adults under stress also need "time out" in both time and space. When I am confronted by something that really makes me angry, I need a "time out" to regain my sanity, to step back from the emotion. Then I can think more clearly about what is happening and make more rational decisions about what I want to do or not do, what I want to say or not say.

When I am in the midst of grief or depression, I often need time alone in a different space than home in order to process my feelings and thoughts. I'm one of those people who can make better decisions if I know why I am thinking or feeling a certain way. I have to accept my thoughts and feelings, but I want to know what has caused them so that I can replicate the good things and eliminate the bad.

Of course, life doesn't often work that way. Neither do we have time to think, time to let the emotions subside before we must decide whether or not to speak or act. Equally as often, we don't discover the whys or causes of our emotions or actions. Sometimes it's a rainy day, even in Australia. Or, we may have to think about events and similar events and deja vu events and even those that repeat themselves for the fourth or fifth or hundredth time before we can see a pattern or a reason or a trigger.

Sometimes I wish life were more predictable, but then I'd be bored. As it is, I always have something to think about. Since I enjoy quiet, thinking is one of my favorite activities. My need for silence is great...not total silence but the absence of human voice or music. In those times, I am filled with the greatness of the world and its creator. I know that I am no more and no less than a grain of sand in the universe; I have my place, and the world would be less without me, but it's a small place.

In the hubris of life's daily ups and downs, I get caught up in how much wisdom I hold and think that others need to have that wisdom; I think that I can make the world a better place by sharing what I have learned. Once in a great while that is true; more often I should keep my mouth shut and mind my own business. On those occasions, I need a "time out" to get the proper perspective on who I am, why I'm here, and how I fit into the total picture.

I like being a big frog in a small pond, always important, growing fat and lazy with admiration and honor. But, the truth is that I'm just the one that the frog gigger is looking to stick and fry my legs. The fatter the frog, the better the fried frog legs. I need to remember that keeping a low profile is good most of the time.

Coaches do their jobs from the sidelines; they aren't out on the playing field. Until recently, you seldom heard about good coaches; you heard about their teams, their players, the records of the team. Every team needs a leader in the middle of the field playing the game. The coach should remain on the sideline and help the leader and players do the best they can do. Coaches that get too much in the limelight often get roasted.

So I keep praying that I can take enough time outs to stay on the sidelines and help others do and be the best they can do or be. God grant me humility.